Oral Sex as the Main Course

Oral sex is often labeled as foreplay, however it’s delicious as the main event. 

Penetrative sex requires a lot of vulnerability and not everyone is a fan, regardless if it’s with fingers, toys, or a penis.

Taking penetration off the table can add variety and inspire creativity in your sex life. It’s also an opportunity to practice giving and receiving pleasure. 

Below are beyond-the-basics oral sex tips for both the giver and receiver.

For the Giver

1. Start with the whole body 

Allow your partner to relax and really savor the experience by stimulating their entire body. Massage their neck and shoulders. Rub their chest. Kiss their entire torso. Give the inner thighs a lot of attention before getting down to it. 

2. Don’t forget your hands

Why limit yourself to only your tongue? You shouldn’t feel uncomfortable doing anything in bed, so if your tongue or jaw are getting tired, use your hands. 

3. The clit and penis aren’t the only stars of the show

Just because you’re going down on someone doesn’t mean you should ignore their other sensitive areas. Being stimulated in multiple areas will likely help your partner orgasm more quickly.

Play with your partner’s nipples. Tickle or lick the perineum (area between anus and vulva/scrotum). Multi-task by penetrating the vagina or anus. 

4. Variety, then consistency

Explore with your tongue and lips, all while paying attention to how your partner responds. Listen for sounds of pleasure and words of affirmation. When you do something that they really like, KEEP DOING THAT THING. Changing it up can make climaxing difficult.

This can be challenging at first, but you’ll become a heat-seeking missile when it comes to locking onto “That Thing” your partner likes.

5. Make eye contact

Eye contact while you’re going down on someone can be very sexy. It also allows you to check in if your partner is enjoying your moves. 

For the Receiver

1. Use noise to get what you need

Even if making noises isn’t natural for you, it can really clue your partner in on what you like. Almost everyone wants to be good in bed, so if they could move a bit to the left to improve your experience, let them know. 

2. Experiment with stimulation lubes 

Stimulating lubes, like peppermint oil, increase blood flow to areas where they are applied. It creates warm, tingly sensations. You can imagine the tingly sensation you get on your tongue when you eat a peppermint on your clit or penis.

3. Sit on their face

The classic lying on your back oral sex position can get old. Sitting on their face can give you more control to move the position of their tongue.

4. Relax and enjoy

Many people find it hard to completely sit back and enjoy pleasure, but remember that your partner is excited to make you feel good! Focus on your breathing if you find your mind wandering. 

Enthusiasm is key

The best technical skill doesn’t matter if you seem bored or uninterested. Make noises, make eye contact, smile, and think of giving oral sex as a great privilege. Your partner is being incredibly vulnerable letting you down there, so show your enthusiasm! 

For the receiver, your partner isn’t going to improve without some feedback. Positive words and noises are hot and great motivation to keep your partner going, and coming back for more. 😛